Sex: Do You Have The Right to Say "No" to Your Husband?

In the SHM Community Forums, Manuel responded to one member who felt that she's not good enough for a wife just because she can't satisfy her husband in bed. He said:

Jessica,

You have the right to out sex on hold until you sort this out. He stepped beyond the norm by pushing you too far. Let him sit and wait, or take care of himself in the bathroom, or cheat on you or whatever he will do. This is a test of his manhood to see if he really is sorry or if he is just a controller who found an easy victim with a psst of abuse.

You have every right not to have sex with him until you are ready. I've known abuse survivors who have not had sex with their husbands for a year or two until they resolves their issues, and their husbands managed to live.

If he loves you, he will give you the space you need without pressure, guilt trips, threats, or acting out with other women. If he 'can't', then he is still an emotional child and not ready to be married now anyway.

Men the world over manage to not have sex for long periods, and they don't die.

As Lizzie said, take care of yourself right now, go to therapy, and become the woman you want to be. How did that first therapy session go, by the way?